Johannes Schult

Joel Johnson twittered: “Have an extra copy of @jonathancoulton‘s “Best. Concert. Ever.” CD & DVD. Will send to the person who records worst JoCo cover in 30 secnds.”

Now I don’t know who he is and I already have the live album he’s giving away. But the challenge sparked my interest. I soon decided to ruin everything by covering “You Ruined Everything”. Falsetto voice meets flutes. There you go.

But while I was setting up my recording gear, I realized that I could try to rush through “Big Dick Farts a Polka” easily. Three Chords, some melodica, a blistered thumb. I also wanted to do a black metal cover of “Skullcrusher Mountain”, but I figured there are already too many bad cover versions out there. Now, while listening to the songs below, please keep in mind that Jonathan Coulton is actually a very good artist; it’s me who ruins everything.

Download “Big Dick Farts a Polka”: mp3 (more music)

Download “I Ruined Everything”: mp3 (more music)

You should know how great things were before I
Came along, singing out of tune
Once this perfect song was gone I knew
I ruined everything in the worsest way

(original words and music by Jonathan Coulton, made worse by Johannes Schult)

Leverage is currently my favorite TV series. It’s not (yet) on TV in Germany, but thankfully I got the DVD set of the first season as a prize for my Song Fu contributions. I watched most of it throughout the past few nights. The show is great! It scores very high in terms of plot and cast. Most episodes could have easily been turned into whole movies. The lead characters are the perfect mix of individuals. Timothy Hutton rocks and I now have a soft spot for Parker. The relationships are subtle and the chemistry mainly woven into the fabric of the job at hand. I like to think that Leverage is about honor among thieves. My favorite episodes (so far) are The Mile High Job, The Homecoming Job and especially The Stork Job. And the two David Jobs make for a supsenseful finale. VOX has secured the broadcasting rights for Germany, so look out for it this Fall.

This is a cover version of a Song Fu entry by the GöDZ PööDLZ. I recorded it rather quickly on my old four-track machine (June 26, 2009). There’s a drum track, two acoustic guitars and some vocals. Please check Song Fu #4 Round 3 for the original song. I re-arranged the song into something that fits my style, editing the lyrics and smoothing the harmonies. Thanks to the writers for letting me do this and share it here!

Download the song: mp3 (more music)

Bomb Squad Girl
We have less than a minute to fall in…
Bomb Squad Girl
My secret desire will never expire
Don’t cut the red wire! Don’t cut the red wire!

Why do I have to wait for a bomb scare to be near you?
The only time you leave the station is when there is a crisis
Bomb Squad Girl
We have less than a minute to fall in…
Bomb Squad Girl
My secret desire will never expire
Don’t cut the red wire! Don’t cut the red wire!

When I’m standing this close I don’t think you notice my heart is about to explode
When you’re so disarming how can I be charming?
So maybe you’ll never know
Never know

You’re da bomb squad…
You’re da bomb squad…
You’re da bomb squad…
You’re da
Bomb Squad Girl
We have less than a minute to fall in…
Bomb Squad Girl
My secret desire will never expire
Don’t cut the red wire! Don’t cut the red wire!

(words and music by Russ Rogers and Rod Durre)

1. Wo kommt mein Essen her?
2. Wo kommt das Futter für mein Essen her?
3. Wer hat meine Kleidung gemacht?

Die zweite Frage erübrigt sich für mich, da ich mich seit Jahren vegetarisch ernähre. Sie ist trotzdem politisch und gesellschaftlich (und, wie sich bei genauerem Hinschauen zeigt, auch ökologisch) hoch brisant. Schon ein Blick in Veröffentlichungen des Deutschen Raiffeisenverbands zeigt, dass z.B. bei Eiweißfuttermitteln jedes Jahr viele Millionen Tonnen Soja aus Südamerika (v.a. Brasilien und Argentinien) in die Europäische Union (dort nicht zuletzt nach Deutschland) importiert wird. Genaue Zahlen findet man etwa in diesem Bericht (von 2007), der auf Seite 6 auch noch folgenden Satz bietet:

Dass die Zerstörung von Amazonas-Regenwaldflächen allerdings nur auf die zunehmende Nachfrage nach nicht kennzeichnungspflichtigem Soja aus der EU zurückzuführen ist, ist unwahrscheinlich.

Interessant, oder? Das kleine Wörtchen nur finde ich besonders reizvoll. Dazu kommt noch nahezu abgeschlossene Verbreitung von gentechnisch veränderten Futtermittel. In einem Bericht aus diesem Jahr heißt es dazu auf Seite 2:

Soja mit einem GVO-Anteil von Null ist auf dem Weltmarkt bereits heute nicht mehr verfügbar.

Fazit: Die Annahme, dass das im Handel angebotene Fleisch – und auch die Milch – vornehmlich von Tieren stammt, die sich ausschließlich vom frischen Gras auf der heimischen Weide ernährt haben, trifft in der Regel nicht zu.

Es ist begrüßenswert, dass es vereinzelte Ausnahmen gibt. Nach Protesten verzichtet Landliebe inzwischen auf GVO-Futtermittel. Und passend zur dritten Frage: Nike verarbeitet ab sofort nur noch urwaldfreundlich produziertes Leder. Da bleibt zu hoffen, dass die Verbraucher ihre Macht erkenen und es sich beim nächsten Einkauf zweimal überlegen, ob sie zu Produkten von Bärenmarke, Weihenstephan, Adidas oder Timberland usw. greifen.

Die erste Frage lässt sich wie auch die anderen beiden nicht in ein paar Sätzen erschöpfend beantworten. Die Kurzantwort sollte aber am besten lauten: aus dem Bioladen und/oder von lokalen Anbietern.

Mein Lieblingsmeteorologe Sven Plöger hat kürzlich ein Buch zum Thema Klimawandel geschrieben. “Gute Aussichten für Morgen” zeichnet sich durch die nötige Ausführlichkeit aus, mit der die einzelnen Unterpunkten abgehandelt werden. Eine unangebrachte Simplifizierung der Sachverhalte wird explizit abgelehnt. Der Text ist dadurch relativ anspruchsvoll ausgefallen. Dafür wird man aber auch nicht mit irgendwelchen Pauschalaussagen abgespeist. Die Lektüre gestaltet sich sicher nicht so flüssig wie bei einem Krimi oder der Fernsehzeitung. Dankenswerterweise wurden die einzelnen Abschnitte jedoch kurz und übersichtlich gehalten. Wenn man etwas nicht auf Anhieb nachvollziehen kann, braucht man nicht ewig weit zurückblättern und suchen, um den Faden wiederzufinden. Zudem sind Bücher, die einen herausfordern nicht automatisch schlecht oder langweilig. Vielmehr überzeugt “Gute Aussichten für Morgen” durch einen schlüssigen Aufbau, der sich viel Platz für die Schilderung des Forschungsstands und die dazugehörigen Theorien zu nehmen. Erst danach wird auf die gesellschaftlichen Aspekt des Klimawandels eingegangen. Hier schimmert die Persönlichkeit des Autors deutlicher durch.

Wer vom Umfang des Buchs abschreckt wird, kann zum praktischen “Buch im Buch” am Ende springen, wo man eine knappe Zusammenfassung bzw. Rekapitulation vorfindet. Sven Plöger zerstreut so zuerst die Zweifel, ob man so viele Seiten lesen kann, dann vermittelt er die Botschaft, die sich auch im Titel wiederspiegelt: Schaffen wir es, den (von uns verursachten Anteil am) Klimawandel auf ein Minimum zu reduzieren und erfolgreich mit den Konsequenzen umzugehen.

Ein Buch, das mich zu einem besseren Menschen gemacht hat.

On June 16th, 2009 Chris de Burgh played a concert at the Arena in Trier. I hadn’t seen him before live before, mainly because the tickets used to be somewhat expensive (especially considering travel expenses). This time I could walk to the venue and got a ticket for about 30 Euros. I sat in the last row of the “Innenraum”, right in front of the mixing desk. Needless to say, the sound was fantastic! (No ear plugs required.) The setlist offered a wide selection of classic hits, surprises and lots of songs from his latest album. The show lasted about 3.5 hours with a short intermission in between.

The audience (approx. 4000 people) appeared to have aged along with the singer on stage, so I felt pretty young. What sets Chris de Burgh apart from other artists is

1. his voice: stunning, moving, strong, tender, amazing, unique, soaring;
2. his songs: deceptive – ballads and catchiness were there, but also rock (“Making the Perfect Man”) and depth (“A Spaceman Came Travelling”); and
3. his character: it’s impossible to not smile at his clumsy German stories, to not rejoice in his unconditional believe in the healing power of love, to not get touched by his pure love for music.

He played lots of songs I longed to hear (“Last Night”) and only few tracks I’d call boring (“The Mirror of the Soul”). Halfway through the concert, he sang “Borderline” without the rest of the band, accompanying himself on the piano. His hauntingly beautiful performance earned him frenetic applause that was well deserved. The one-hour long finale was filled with his great songs as well as a powerful version of Toto’s “Africa”. So attending the concert was well worth my time and money. Chris de Burgh is still one of the best voices and writers out there.

1. Last Night
2. Missing You
3. Sailing Away
4. Turn! Turn! Turn! (Byrds-Cover)
5. Oh My Brave Hearts
6. The Long and Winding Road (Beatles-Cover)
7. Without You (Mariah Carey-Cover)
8. The Mirror of the Soul
9. Leather on My Shoes
10. All Along the Watchtower (Bob Dylan-Cover)
11. Love of the Heart Devine
12. Moonlight and Vodka
13. Borderline
14. Always on My Mind (Elvis Presley-Cover)
15. The Last Thing on My Mind (Tom Paxton-Cover)
16. A Spaceman Came Travelling
17. The Same Sun
18. Where Peaceful Waters Flow
19. The Lady in Red
20. Africa (Toto-Cover)
21. Making the Perfect Man
22. The Words I Love You
23. Bal Masque
24. Ship to Shore / The Getaway
25. Say Goodbye to It All
26. Don’t Pay the Ferryman
27. High on Emotion
28. The Snows of New York
29. Footsteps

On Saturday, June 13, 2009 I finally attended my first Richard Shindell concert. I had come all the way to England from Germany after logistics prevented me from seeing any of the Dutch gigs. This occasion warrants a long, verbose report (which is actually a condensed version of my post on the RS mailing list), although it’s going to bore you all to death. I’m very sorry.

The Headgate Theatre in Colchester was a small place (83 seats); the people there were incredibly nice and polite. Pavlov’s Cat opened with half a dozen songs that fit the bill, but (in my humble/ignorant opinion) lacked the overarching melody lines. This is, of course just me – I saw several people happily buying their cd afterwards. The talk in between songs was very entertaining and helped to access the songs (which I hadn’t heard before). An unannounced support followed their wake: Hannah Scott & John Carden. Again, there was a lot of musical talent on stage, on the spot, but not tense. Again, the music was nice, but didn’t have gripping stories/soaring melodies gripping my attention.

There was a short break and Richard came out to do a quick sound/line check. He played a verse and a chorus of an unknown song. It turned out to be a new composition. He opened his set with it, eventually. It has a steady beat and a rather upbeat mood, although it’s actually about the loss of a pet/dog. It’s possibly called “Abby” as the chorus goes something like “Abby’s gone to the country” – but maybe it just doesn’t have a title, yet. Funnily, there was a guide dog in the audience. All in all, it was a neat opener and a welcome surprise. Still, its lyrics are more in the vein of “Get Up Clara”; there’s not as much drama as in songs like “Fishing”.

The setlist (see below) contained a few surprises (mainly from the album “Blue Divide”). Richard’s guitar work was stunning (e.g., “Get Up Clara”). The dynamics he got of his guitar were amazing. By the way: Richard played only one acoustic guitar during the whole evening; no bouzouki, no electric guitar. Also, no 50-piece orchestra. After the formidable encore “Cold Missouri Waters” I was both happy and sad. It was a worthy ending, yet, of course, so many great songs remained unplayed; no need to list them here.

Richard played about 85 minutes and was (I think) very talkative in between songs. I got to chat with him a bit after the show and he was so humble and nice and everything. He also described in great detail to someone else the (imaginary) location of Mariana’s in relation to the “Not Far Now” cover picture. All in all, the concert was really great (“Reunion Hill”!) and well worth the trip. I sat in the third row and had a perfect view and all was good!

1. Abby
2. Fenario
3. Blue Divide
4. Get Up Clara
5. Balloon Man
6. Arrowhead
7. Reunion Hill
8. There Goes Mavis
9. Are You Happy Now?
10. You Stay Here
11. Transit
12. Ascent
13. Cold Missouri Waters

Yesterday, the Hooters played for an hour at the Arena of Pop festival in Mannheim. There were many people (possibly more than 100000); the weather was nice; the sound was quite good. The setting couldn’t compare to the intensity of a club show. Still, it was nice watch the band win over the audience one song at a time. Of course, they played their hits (omitting “500 Miles” for some reason) along with a couple of newer songs and a rocking version of “Great Big American Car”. Here’s the setlist:

1. I’m Alive
2. Day by Day
3. All You Zombies
4. Great Big American Car
5. The Boys of Summer
6. Johnny B
7. Morning Buzz
8. Karla With A K
9. Twenty-Five Hours a Day
10. Satellite
11. And We Danced

Yesterday, Blind Guardian headlined the second day of the Bang Your Head-Festival in Balingen. It was their only show in Germany this year. Still, the audience wasn’t really packed. To be more precise: many people were scattered across the festival site, but you could easily walk up to close to the stage even while the intro (“War of Wrath”) was already playing. I’m not a big fan of Blind Guardian’s newer material, so I reckoned this was one of the last chances to experience their melodic speed metal stuff without too many distracting modern songs. The band definitely delivered, starting out with fantastic songs like “Another Holy War” and “Traveller in Time” before throwing a couple of surprises (“Blood Tears”, “Goodbye My Friend”). I was repeatedly amazed by the singalongability of their classics. Further highlights included “Time What Is Time” and “Lord of the Rings”, which were accompanied by rain. The rain didn’t diminish the joy I felt upon hearing these pearls. Blind Guardian are not a good show act. Their sparse on-stage action is far from remarkable. Fortunately, the music easily made up for this. As it happened, I found myself singing the chorus of “Valhalla” with a bunch of other fans for a rather long time after the show ended. Wahoo!

1. Time Stands Still (at the Iron Hill)
2. Another Holy War
3. Nightfall
4. Traveller in Time
5. Turn the Page
6. The Script for My Requiem
7. Blood Tears
8. Goodbye My Friend
9. This Will Never End
10. Valhalla
11. Sacred
12. Time What Is Time
13. Lord of the Rings
14. Punishment Divine
15. Imaginations From the Other Side
16. The Bard’s Song – In the Forest
17. Mirror Mirror

During the past couple of weeks a lot of things happened. I have a hard time catching up, so I just list the events here before they’re so last year. Also, the Twitter plug-in (formerly in the right column is misbehaving, so I turned it off for the time being.

• Van Canto played a great open air concert in Trier.
• I saw Richard Shindell live in Colchester, UK. He was as good as I had hoped.
• Finally, I saw Chris de Burgh in concert (here in Trier). He delivered a wonderful three-hour show.